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After a Domestic Violence Homicide

Published

Resources for Community-Based Domestic Violence Advocacy Programs

When a domestic violence homicide occurs, community-based domestic violence programs are often called upon to respond quickly. Advocates may receive calls from news media, law enforcement, community partners, survivors, or grieving family members.

Advocates and program directors have multiple roles in their communities that often overlap. In a moment of crisis or public attention, they may be called upon to be public figures, subject matter experts, community members, institutional partners, employers, and confidential service providers all at once.

This resource is intended to help programs think through the practical questions that often arise in the hours, days, and weeks following a domestic violence homicide.

You do not need to do everything in this guide. And most importantly, you don’t have to do it alone! Use what is helpful for your program, your staff, your community, and the families and survivors you serve. For questions or support, reach out to the Coalition. We want to hear from you.

In this resource:

·       Responding to Media Inquiries

·       Showing up for your community

·       Supporting program staff

·       Legal Response & Confidentiality

·       Systems Advocacy & Prevention

Responding to Media Inquiries

Following a domestic violence homicide, community-based advocacy programs are often contacted by reporters seeking information, reaction, or context. By talking to reporters, you can help increase public understanding of domestic violence and highlight resources for survivors and opportunities for prevention.

News stories develop quickly, while facts are still unknown and advocates, families, and communities are still processing the loss. In most cases, you will not be able to comment directly on the facts of any specific incident. Instead, focus on the key messages you want survivors and your community to hear. For example:

  • Help is available. Domestic violence advocacy services are always free and confidential. Anyone can reach out for help or to learn how to support a friend or family member.
  • Honor the victim’s life. Remember the individual as a whole person whose life mattered – not just as a victim of domestic violence. Model speaking about victims and their communities with dignity and respect.
  • Domestic violence deaths are preventable. Communities can reduce risk by investing in survivor-centered advocacy, strengthening community supports, and working together to prevent violence.
  • Everyone has a role to play. Friends, family members, employers, educators, faith communities, healthcare providers, neighbors, and community organizations all have opportunities to recognize abuse, support survivors, and connect people with help.

Our Responding to Media Requests about Domestic Violence Homicides resource offers practical guidance on:

  • Preparing for interviews and responding to reporters’ questions
  • Developing clear, survivor-centered messages
  • Avoiding speculation about specific cases while providing helpful context about domestic violence
  • Answering the question: what can people do?

Related Resource

Showing Up for Your Community

After a homicide, family members, friends, neighbors, and entire communities may be grieving, fearful, or angry. Community members may be searching for answers or wondering how to help. Community-based domestic violence programs have an important role to play in shaping the public conversation and helping communities take meaningful action.

Speaking Out / Reaching Out

Consider where your program’s voice and leadership is needed in response to a death in your community.

  • Share key messages directly with the public through your website, email lists, and social media channels.
  • Submit a letter to the editor or guest editorial to your local newspaper.
  • Engage in online comments on social media and news stories. Model respectful, compassionate language to talk about victims and their communities.   
  • Provide talking points to staff, board and volunteers.
  • Reach out to community partners, such as the members of a coordinated community response team, domestic violence task force, or other workgroups where your program has a leadership role. Your leadership can help groups make meaning without finger pointing, and offer direction for those looking to take action in response to the homicide.
  • If you are aware of specific communities or organizations the victim was involved in, reach out to offer your program’s condolences and support.
Vigils, Memorials, and Community Gatherings

Public gatherings can provide powerful opportunities for remembrance, healing, education, and community connection. These rituals can take many forms. A vigil may be led by your program, by another community group, or by friends and family of the victim. It may be organized quickly in response to a particular victim’s death, or an annual vigil honoring all victims. Your event may be focused on ritual and healing, or community education and taking action. Public vigils bring together people with different relationships to the victim, different experiences of the violence, and different hopes for what the gathering should accomplish.

Before organizing or participating in a public event, consider:

  • Have those closest to the person being remembered been invited to shape the event?
  • Are there cultural, spiritual, or community traditions that should guide the gathering?
  • How will privacy and confidentiality be protected?
  • How will media participation be managed?
  • Does the event honor the person’s life as well as acknowledge their death?
  • Are there ways survivors and community members can participate that feel safe and meaningful?
Simple Ways to Show Up

Not every meaningful community response is public. Small acts of care communicate that a person’s life mattered, that their community has not forgotten them, and that their loved ones do not have to navigate their grief alone.

Consider simple actions such as:

  • Sending a condolence card or flowers to the family or loved ones, when appropriate.
  • Sending a card to a school, faith community, Tribal community, workplace, or other organization connected to the victim.
  • Sharing information about community vigils, memorials, or fundraisers through your organization’s social media or newsletters, with the permission of the organizers.
  • Amplifying requests for practical support, such as meal trains, mutual aid efforts, or verified fundraising campaigns.
  • Sharing information about the homicide and available resources with local elected officials, community leaders, or organizational partners to encourage a thoughtful, informed response.
  • Attending a vigil, memorial, or community gathering simply to bear witness and offer support.
  • Continuing to check in after the public attention has faded, when families and communities often feel most alone.

Related Resources

  • LetsReimagine Virtual Vigil Toolkit –Ideas for creating meaningful, inclusive community vigils and remembrance events.
  • Help Planning Tool and Reconnecting Tool – Resources for supporting friends, family members that could be useful to interrupt the isolation that can follow a death of a loved one.
  • MMIW Toolkit for Families & Communities  – Designed to assist families, communities, and advocacy organizations in understanding and responding to a case of a missing or murdered Native woman.

Supporting Advocates & Program Staff

One of the most important roles your program may have in responding to a domestic violence homicide in your community is tending to the impact on staff. Advocates may be grieving the loss of a client or community member, experiencing anger or self-doubt, managing increased workloads, responding to media inquiries, or supporting others while processing their own reactions. Responses to trauma are very personal and individual, and some reactions may be unexpected.

Make Time | Create Space

Allow staff time to gather, share information, ask questions, and acknowledge the emotional impact of the homicide. Recognize that people process difficult events differently, and avoid minimizing or comparing reactions.

Consider creating space for staff to share, if they wish, the practices or rituals that help them honor a person’s life and death. Some people may light candles, sing, pray, observe a moment of silence, cover mirrors, wear ribbons or armbands, prepare food, spend time in nature, or draw on other cultural, spiritual, or personal traditions.

Programs do not need to adopt any particular practice. Simply acknowledging that people grieve in different ways—and making room for those practices when appropriate—can help staff feel seen, supported, and connected to one another.

Debrief with Purpose

If your program had any contact with the victim, or any role in responding to the homicide, it may be helpful to offer a structured opportunity to debrief with the relevant staff.

A debrief is not an investigation, a performance review, or a fatality review. Its purpose is to reduce isolation, support staff, share information, surface questions, and identify immediate next steps.

Keep debriefs focused, voluntary whenever possible, and mindful of confidentiality. Stay focused on what is known and be clear about what is unknown. Don’t rush to analysis or draw conclusions about what your program or other systems may learn from this experience. Consider returning to systems analysis once staff have had an opportunity to process the immediate impact of the homicide.

Remember Resilience

One of the strongest protective factors against secondary traumatic stress is remaining connected to the purpose and meaning of the work.

As appropriate, take time to recognize the countless ways advocates help survivors every day, celebrate acts of courage and compassion, and reconnect with purpose.

Supervisors and colleagues can continue supporting one another by checking in regularly, redistributing work when needed, encouraging the use of available supports, and creating a workplace culture where difficult conversations are welcome.

Related Resources

Legal Response & Confidentiality

A domestic violence homicide often marks the beginning of a lengthy criminal and, sometimes, civil legal process. Investigations, charging decisions, court proceedings, and media attention may continue for months or even years.

Community-based advocacy programs play an important role in helping survivors, families, and communities navigate this difficult process. While every case is different, maintaining clear roles, protecting confidentiality, and remaining grounded in survivor-centered advocacy can help programs respond consistently and thoughtfully.

Confidentiality

A domestic violence homicide does not change a program’s obligation to protect the victim’s confidentiality. Even after a victim has died, advocates should continue to protect confidential communications and avoid disclosing whether an individual received services unless authorized or legally required to do so.

Programs should also consider the privacy and safety of surviving family members, children, witnesses, and other survivors who may be affected by public attention surrounding the case.

If your program receives requests for information from law enforcement, attorneys, reporters, family members, or others, follow your organization’s confidentiality policies and applicable law.

Consider using the “In the Event of My Death” release of information form with clients. This form lets a client choose what information they want to allow your program to release in the event the client dies.

Related Resources:

Survivors Accused of Homicide

Some homicides involve domestic violence survivors who have killed their abusive partner. These cases often generate intense public attention and strong opinions. However, there is often very little information publicly available about the facts of the case or the events leading up to the homicide. Avoid making assumptions about the facts or speculating about the outcome of legal proceedings.

If you are working with a survivor who is accused of a crime, remain grounded in the principles of survivor-centered advocacy, confidentiality, and respect for due process. Community-based advocacy programs are independent from the criminal legal system and have a long history of supporting survivor defendants. While each case is unique, advocacy programs can continue to provide survivor-centered advocacy consistent with their mission, program policies, and applicable law. This may include helping survivor defendants understand legal processes, connecting them with specialized legal resources, supporting family members, and helping communities understand the complex realities of domestic violence, coercive control, and self-defense.

Related Resources

Systems Advocacy & Prevention

In some cases, a victim’s death brings to light obvious failures in the community safety net.  This can be a powerful catalyst for communities to take action to protect survivors and prevent violence.

Consider using a structured process, such as domestic violence fatality review. These multidisciplinary reviews are not intended to assign blame or reinvestigate individual cases. Instead, they seek to understand how systems, policies, practices, and community responses can better support survivors and prevent violence.

Consider questions such as:

  • Where did the victim try to find help or safety? What happened?
  • What did the victim need? What options did they have to get it in our community? What barriers did they encounter?
  • What could have prevented the violence before it started? What could have kept it from getting worse? Where did community members, institutions, or systems have opportunities to reduce harm or risk to this victim?
  • What could have prevented the abuser from causing harm? Where did community members, institutions, or systems have opportunities to intervene?
  • Where are there gaps between policy (what is supposed to happen) and practice (what happens on the ground)? Why?
  • What worked well that should be strengthened?
  • Whose perspectives are missing from the conversation? How are survivors, family members, and culturally specific communities being included?

Contact us for more resources, or help thinking about how to lead these conversations in your community.

Related Resources